- Do you always have to know every detail of what’s going on around you? And does it lead to obsessive behaviors? (such as counting calories, making strange lists out of everything such as all the books and DVDs you own, or even triple checking everything you do?)
- Do you find yourself dictating to others how things should be done?
… What your boyfriend plans to cook for the night? Which recipe he will actually use? What exactly we need to pack for the holidays? If the hotel will be in the perfect area for logistic purposes? Who has Paul invited to the party on Sunday night? What will be the exact program of our week-end?
- Do you constantly anticipate your actions and plan different scenario ahead for fear that things won’t turn out the way you want to?
- And do you change who you are or what you believe in so that someone will accept you?
…If you recognize yourself in the above behaviors, you are probably a “control freak”.
I don’t mean that in a bad way, of course, but you should know that you don’t have to feel vulnerable at the idea of someone else managing things their own way.
Besides, there is no point pressuring others to change in order to avoid changing yourself.
And at last, by playing a role to please others, you are actually trying to change the impression that they have about of you….
So stop controlling everything. Listen to the Beatles, and you will have the answer…Let it be!
Below are a few tips to help you change your “Little Miss/Mr. Perfect” attitude:
- Don’t be afraid to tell people what you want. And let them do it their own way
- Do not see criticism and confrontation as a bad thing
- Try to give up control in a small area
- Accept that a large portion of life is laced with unknown
I have personally decided to let go slowly of the control I have on myself, and specifically on food. First, I have hidden my scale, and I know time will come when I will stop keeping track of the daily amount of calories that I eat…
I am sure that these small changes will help me in many ways to embrace life as it comes and to learn how to be satisfied with what I have.